I am going a
bit more bridal frou frou with this one everyone. Let’s talk about Two of
Everything. As the wise band Nelson said, ‘Two
heads are better than one, double the pleasure, triple the fun’. Is it
though? And when is two just one too many?
Life is
geared up to couples, true – when I was single it was often a point of
frustration that I had no-one to share the financial cost of going to a friend’s
party or wedding if it were far away. However, now BF and I pay out of our
joint account, I actually find myself feeling like I am paying more. After all,
if I shared a £100 room with a friend back ‘in’t good old days I would have
paid £50, right? Now I pay £100 to all intents and purposes; it just comes from
our joint account.
Now, we have
two wedding rings and even two engagement rings. Some people have two types of
wedding cake. Many women have two sets of wedding shoes (high ones and low
ones) and others even have two weddings. You can often do a better job in
general with two people. But you can’t have a fight on your own. And sometimes
two is just too many for some jobs.
The decision
to have a second dress is one which a lot of women think about, even if it’s
briefly dismissed. And why not? It is the only time in your life when you will
spend that amount of money on a dress. And if you have ever tried to dance or
do anything sensible in a long frock with a train, you will understand why it’s
nice to have maybe a shorter version for the evening. Why stress it really? If
your bustle doesn’t work do you want to be worrying about it being ripped as
people get more enthusiastic or even (god forbid) being unable to dance because
the bloody thing is getting in the way?
Many people
decide that they will combat this choice by having a day dress (long) and then
have a separate dancing dress which they can have a good boogie in. And maybe
show off their shoes…. In fact, a number
of articles on the Telegraph
online, Inside
Weddings and Brides
Website talk about this choice some women make. Even the Huffington
Post and the NY
Times got involved. People were doing it long before Kim Kardashian did it.
Wedding boards on The Knot and Wedding Bee are full of the question,
‘Should I wear two dresses?’ Interesting that they feel they need ask
permission of their peers … More on that later.
My friend’s
sister went the whole hog and had two different dresses, a longer ballroom
style dress and then a short 1950’s one for the evening. Her take on the 'two dress is better than one'
question was: ‘I only bought the second dress the
week before the wedding as I thought at the last min it would be good to have
something shorter I could dance in. My first one was from Monique L’Huillier
and the second one was Phase Eight. I was really glad I had a second one, it
was much more relaxed for the party section of the day. I also went all out
with a second pair of shoes from Jimmy Choo, the short dress really showed them
off.’
The other
option of course is to get one dress which gives you the option of having two
dresses without having to get changed, Poppy Delevingne style which is
generally more practical and less expensive in the long run. Also it means a
quick change of 5 minutes doesn’t turn into half an hour in the loo changing.
There are even websites like this one, 2in1 which
have two in one dresses for this very purpose. The wedding industry is wising
up… You only have to look at the number of very expensive lace tops offered in
most bridal shops to realise that many people like to have this option. After
all, if you’re having a church wedding you don’t really want to be flashing too
much flesh but neither do you want to be trussed up like a lace turkey for your
disco.
My friend MD,
did a similar thing to what I plan to do myself and had a dress which could
take her throughout the day from the ceremony to the party with a simple top
that came off to transform the dress.
She told me,
‘I basically tried on a few dresses and as I got nearer to
what I wanted I started to look online as well. I found my dress as I'd tried a
similar one on by the same designer that wasn't quite right but I really liked
the style. It just so happened that it was both affordable and 2 dresses in one
- bonus! And I completely fell in love with it partly because of its
versatility and how fun it was.’
Similarly, I will have a
dress which might not be quite so versatile (she went from lacey, slinky bridal
to full on elegant white slink backless in the evening – I was most impressed),
but will have a bit more flesh on show in the evening thanks to some lace
construction by Mrs McW for the church bit.
The question I am guessing
that you are asking is, since when did being a bride become a fashion show? In
the same way that actors used to wear just the ones dress at the Oscars,
suddenly we have hosts in four or five of them. 
Is it fair to call them ‘costume
changes’ and should we be feeling guilty about changing our dress halfway
through our big day? Surely one dress is enough?
I don’t know about that.
Honestly, it’s an inordinate amount of money to spend on a dress. I can fully understand why many readers are rolling their eyes that women feel they want to milk one day for all it's worth while people oo and ahh over yet another wardrobe change. But if you
want to have a great dance in the evening and you’re getting married at 1pm,
why wouldn’t you have a cheaper dancing option to change into? I can't see how anyone would object to that as a practicality, even if you don't agree with it in theory.
I haven’t quite gone for two, mainly as I want
to get my money’s worth out of number 1 and will most likely stay in it until I’m
forced out of it, but I have made sure that I get a second shot at the whole
‘I’M A BRIDE!’ feeling regardless.
We have
wound up having a second reception to fit in M&D’s friends and some of our
chums who have families (we are strictly no children on the Saturday) and M
felt it was important to be ‘bridal’ for both. I refused to put the dress from
the previous day on (I have done enough plays in period costume to know that I’ll
never want to put it on ever again after spending 14 hours plus in it) so I went
for a second option.
Today was an
exciting day at work as my second dress arrived. It is a particularly beautiful
frock from Honeypie Boutique.
Amazingly enough, at £149.99 you can have a made to measure 1950’s style silk
dress in any colour you want in a whole variety of styles with sleeves, over
skirts, extra petticoats…the works. Frankly I’d have had it for my actual
wedding dress.
I might be
mildly in love with this site.
I cannot
therefore stand here and say that you shouldn’t have a second dress. However I do
think that if you can’t afford a second dress and want one, restrain yourself!
Remember, want is different to need. If you can afford it, well, you
technically only get married once. There is a little Kim Kardashian in every
woman deep down….
